Eating did not go spectacularly today. Nor was it catastrophic. I did have some more cashews and a Lean Cuisine late in the day.
Then I went out erranding for ages, picked up a protein shake that turned out to be lousy. A couple hours later, starving and exhausted, i got a chicken quesadilla from Wawa for dinner. I figured it was better than a hoagie.I got a diet iced tea, too – trying to stay away from sodas in all forms but didn’t want water or juice. I didn’t get home til 11.
Got home, miserable, [[personal stuff + pain, etc]] and needed to calm down. Took some of my very helpful Ativan, some painkillers, and it’s all starting to feel a little better.Full disclosure, because I fully believe that mental health should not be a stigma: I see a therapist and a psychiatrist and I am on an anti-depressant and anti-anxiety medication. I don’t go parading it around, but I don’t want to be secretive or embarrassed about it, either.
I also wanted a snack to wash that down with so i had a snack box and several glasses of water.
Suddently writing it all down doesn’t make it seem so bad 🙂 My first goal needs to be to get my eating back on a healthy track and get myself cooking more and eating better all-around. Then I can start to take things out of my diet. It’s just the mindset that i have to get into of “no, i don’t eat that, i eat healthy.” I have been there before and I know it’s both gradual and sudden. You keep working at it and you wake up one day and you don’t have to think about it anymore. I am trying to be aware of what is gluten-free and such because I’ve never gone down that road before, so it may be more challenging, but it’s well worth it for my health. I’d love to have more information from women with endo and how they’ve treated it, experience with diets, etc. Please feel free to comment or contact me! I’m trying to get my blog around in places where I think other endo sisters will see it, because that’s really who I’d like to connect with here.