Had carrots & hummus for a snack, and some cookie balls. Forgot to take pictures of the carrots.
Came home on the bus feeling miserable, headache-y, and in lots of pain. Had leftover pasta for dinner x2. Ate a couple zucchini chips when i took them out of the dehydrator. So good!
Had a little bit of a breakdown trying to figure out what I want to do about medication, decided to get a second opinion, especially on how to treat the Hashimoto’s. Feel a little better about that. Did some more cooking! Made this vegan feta cheese, can’t wait to bake it and try it. Made this cracker recipe using gluten-free flour and some flax seed, came out well. Sliced up the rest of the zucchini and put it in the dehydrator. Also made these coconut bars and put them in the freezer.
Got home tonight, I had taken my boyfriend’s car to work because he stayed home. I had some coconut bread for a snack and then immediately crashed out on the couch and took something because i was in tons of pain. He hadn’t answered a text, so I figured I was sleeping and I’d bring his car back later. Then he gets pissed about that.
I go back to sleep, get up, make an awesome dinner, and then he gets pissed at me for tweeting a picture of awful traffic. Seriously? I wasn’t even moving. He uses his phone in the car all the time. I have never been in an accident, gotten a ticket, etc. Ever. So I got pissed, drove his car back, tossed the keys inside the door and walked home. And now he’s more pissed. I told him I had a horrible day and needed love and support from him, not being treated like a child. Now I feel like I can’t talk to him about any of this and how scared I am, and I’m so upset and I can’t stop crying.
Dinner – Butternut squash mac & “cheese.” This is a great recipe, hadn’t made it before. Used this brown rice pasta, and it was so good, you’d never know it was rice pasta.
I also put some kale and zucchini in the dehydrator – used this recipe. can’t wait to see how they turn out!
I also washed a bunch of the greens I got yesterday, and tossed some in the freezer.
Now I just need to relax and get some sleep.
Had a picnic box for lunch and made one of my favorite vegan Mac and cheese recipe with gluten free pasta and brown rice cereal for breadcrumbs. May have eaten too much of it, but it’s delicious and I did leave some for lunch this week. Also had a small granola bar and a coconut water Popsicle.
Made some cookie dough balls for snacks for the week too. Now I have two different kinds of those, plus granola bars and fruit leather. Made some hummus (hint – remove the skins – takes a while but I swear it’s worth it) and some cucumber chips in the dehydrator. we’ll see how those are.
Still feeling tired and sick, but well enough to cook. I’ve missed cooking. Being so tired and ill and depressed kept me from cooking for awhile, and certainly led to much of my weight gain. I’m feeling so much better about myself and my nutrition. It’s nice to not constantly be down in the dumps anymore. I had a hell of a roller coaster with some different anti-depressants but it seems like I’ve got a good one now.
Sometimes I feel like I’ve spent so long fighting my body that I can’t always tell him I’m really hungry or not. I know I didn’t bring enough food to work today, but then I had a horrible headache when I got home. Eating seemed to make it better… but then it came right back. And I still feel awful and achy and sick and have abdominal pain.
I had a granola bar for a snack at work, and an unpictured jolly rancher. When I got home I had brown rice cereal with almond milk, a hot pocket, a picnic box, a couple crackers, some wine, and a lean cuisine. god, that sounds awful. Now I feel worse. And to top it off, I was reading The China Study the whole time. I can’t get over the research in this book. Plant-based diets have such a startling amount of research backing them, it’s amazing that animal protein hasn’t been classified as poison. I’m also watching Weight of the Nation (an HBO series) that I downloaded. Pretty interesting stuff, too. Hoping that watching this and getting some rest helps me start over tomorrow. But I did have a ton of produce this week!
Today was long and busy – meetings and lots of work to be done. We’re finishing up a big backend change to our website and it’s launching after Easter.
Lunch today was a salad with black beans and some (stale) crushed up tortilla chips and chipotle ranch dressing. Sort of sad without avocado, but delicious anyway. And a picnic box. Snacks were granola bar, fruit and grain bar, yogurt, and of course, tea. And I had an unpictured jolly rancher.
I went to my boyfriend’s after work for what was supposed to be a minute because I am hurting and not feeling well. We have been making our own wine, which seems to be far more difficult than the kit lets on. We thought we had a 5 minute step today (de-gassing) but we spent hours and it’s still fizzing… *sigh*. If we have 6 gallons of crappy wine, it is not going to be good (I said we should just buy 20 gallons of sprite and make wine cooler!)
So I was starving when I got home and just wanted to eat a big dinner. I made a lean cuisine, a salad with caesar dressing (Brianna’s is vegetarian and delicious), whole wheat toast with butter, and a glass of sweet red wine. really hit the spot. Then I made a microwave brownie concotion with almond flour, cocoa powder, coconut butter, a dash of salt, water, and soy/dairy free chocolate chips. It was really delicious. Funny how this meal seems so unhealthy to me but it really isn’t, when you look at it. Not endo-diet, but hey, i didn’t eat out, and I had my vegetables! One step at a time 🙂 And I was in a lot of pain and tired of it so I took some Vicodin. I haven’t all week, but my dreams have been awful anyway so it doesn’t seem to matter. I just don’t want to take it during the day.
I’m planning on reading for a while (almost halfway through The China Study – more and more fascinating every chapter! So much I didn’t know) and then getting to bed. I am so tired and drained, I could barely stay away today, and I need to review my code and make sure things are really in shape tomorrow at work.
I may have accidentally finished off a pint of coconut coconut milk ice cream without even taking a picture. Shame on me! I really need to scoop it out of the container and into a bowl. Vegan though it may be, it is certainly not to be eaten by the pint…
Snacks today were a few of the granola bars I made earlier (so good!) and dinner was leftover soup from last night. I still feel vaguely unsatisfied, not sure why.
And not a great one. Personal things still getting me down. Food at work was ok, forgot pictures. Had a picnic box and a lean cuisine. Had a small fries and a small shake at Wendy’s in the afternoon with my boyfriend. Then I went I target to go shopping, which was mostly a bust, everything was too small. I got some underwear and cute sandals. Went to the bank, and the grabbed dinner at Chipotle – burrito bowl with no rice and chips on the side. Then I went to dress barn and found a ton of cute dresses that fit and found out I hadn’t used my card in a year so it got cancelled without me knowing and my credit is shot so they couldn’t put it back. So I put them all on layaway and i’ll get them when I get paid tomorrow. Now I’m at a cafe waiting for my boyfriend to be done with a meeting and pick me up. I got a slim chai latte, which is pretty good. Not picture worthy. I’m tired and I am supposed to go to this VIP beer gala at 8 and I just don’t want to. I feel and look like crap but I don’t want to bail.
Just one of those days.